finding my folx: moving from categories to community-building

1939 — Star pupil, 82 years old, reading her lesson in adult class, Gee’s Bend, Alabama.

diving deeper
into… out of
and into again
depression
isolation
a journey to belong
to something
to someone
to somewhere
and then… finally
to me
I created a colorful garden of love:
beautiful, courageous souls
sunflowers at the brightest hour
rooted and committed
strong and secure
open and free

It’s been a while since I’ve made time to write creatively and freely. I could blame the never-ending grant applications that need to be submitted on time, or the constant school deadlines, or the academic papers that need to be published, or any of the thousands of things on my to-do list. But I know those are just scapegoats. I haven’t made time to write because I’ve been trying to figure myself out — and I guess more specifically, figure out how I can show up authentically and courageously in the diverse spaces God has called me to live, love, and serve. I’ve realized this is a beautiful and eternal “figuring out” — a lifelong journey of many lifetimes.

I’ve decided that I will write again. Not just for academic scholarship or grant money or political propaganda — but to be creative and free.

Over the past three years, I’ve been intentionally rebuilding my world and ‘finding my folx’ as some people might say. I use the term ‘folx’ because, to me, it represents the diversity and beauty of the many community members I know and love. As I’ve been consciously expanding my world, I’ve discovered the value of committing to both a church home and a political home — of being in community with folx who know the carpenter and the revolutionary. Moreover, I’ve learned how to make a home in places (like academia) that initially felt foreign to me — how to take up space and listen to the ancestors who are guiding and protecting us. This pursuit has required me to be brave, open, humble, and committed to moving from categories to community-building.

While there is power in naming and categorizing, these acts are also inherently limiting. The ‘named’ and ‘categorized’ become bound by the limits of our imagination and understanding. If we aren’t careful, these acts can give us a false sense of power and control, leading us to believe that our naming conventions equate to Truth (with a big T) rather than the ability to hold many, partial truths (small t). I believe eternal Power is nameless; limitless. It just is. Or, in the words of Jesus, “I am.” In Charles H. Bennett’s translation of the Tao Te Ching, entry # 1 reminds us:

“The Tao that can be described is not the eternal and unchanging Tao. The name that can be spoken is not the lasting and unchanging name.”

Rather than trying to define myself or others, I’ve found joy in having dialogue, appreciating alignment, and honoring differences. I’ve also found peace and clarity in recognizing that I don’t want or need to understand or be in community with everyone. For me, alignment is critical in discerning with whom and how I want to build community. When I pledged Delta, I received the line name “The Inquisitor” — lately, I’ve been leaning into that identity to sharpen my discernment. I ask myself and others questions to understand ‘who we are and whose we are.’

Some of my favorite questions to explore are focused on these five areas of my identity:

1. Faith & Spirituality/Religion: Who or what do you submit to and worship? Why?
2. Political Beliefs: How do you think we humans should live together, govern ourselves, and balance or share power?
3. Ethnic-Racial Identity (ERI): How do you conceptualize your ERI, and what, if any, are your commitments to others within your ERI conception? How do you desire to relate to those within and outside of your ERI conception?
4. Economic Position/Class: What economic positions/social classes do you identify with? Why? What, if any, are your commitments to others within the economic positions/social classes you identify with?
5. Gender Identity: How do you conceptualize your gender identity, and what, if any, are your commitments to others within your gender conception? How do you desire to relate to those within and outside of your gender conception?

Again, the purpose of asking these questions is not to categorize or separate; it’s to discern if and how I can create harmony with others — to determine if there’s enough alignment to cultivate a working and loving relationship. Sometimes the questions are asked and answered directly with words, and other times the answers arrive indirectly by Spirit, sign, and action.

How do you go about finding your folx? What do you prioritize when community-building? Why? I’d love to read your thoughts in the comments.

Much love & light,

Joy

Thanks for reading! If you enjoyed this meditation, show it some love by clapping, sharing, and/or leaving a comment. If you’re interested in reading future posts, make sure to follow me.

About Me: I’m Joy. I’m a community-engaged researcher, writer, lightworker—dark child of God. I’m currently a PhD Student at the Yale School of Public Health, and the Founder & CEO of Butterfly Dreamz, Inc. — a 501(c)(3) nonprofit based in Gary, IN, and Newark, NJ that advances the leadership and well-being of girls and all young people through mentorship, holistic leadership development, and intergenerational community action. You can learn more about me and my work at joylindsay.com.